I have a dream.....

It's my 25th wedding anniversary next year and I know what I'd really love to do. Unfortunately we also won't have the money for it, so it's likely to just remain a distant dream.

When we got married we didn't have much money. Although I would have loved to have got married in a church, with all the works it just didn't happen. We got married at Woking Registry Office-ok I suppose but the photos were taken in a car park. Might have had trees in the background of the photos, but it doesn't take away the fact that I knew it was the car park. I never had the excitement of trying on loads of dresses in a bridal shop-mine was mail order from the back of a Brides magazine. Our 'reception' was at a local pub and a total disaster, followed by a few people back to my mum's house. Our honeymoon to Cornwall lasted one night exactly-it only lasted that long because we didn't have the petrol to get back home again. I wish I could have my day all over again, but this time how I want it-and have a honeymoon that won't be a total disaster.

What I would totally love to do is to renew our wedding vows, but on a beach in the Caribbean-or somewhere in Australia. That way we'd get the 'honeymoon' at the same time. Sounds stupid, but I think that, with the way a lot of people view marriage these days, 25 years is something to be proud of and to celebrate with a bit more than the usual meal out. What with being on CD we didn't even do that this year. Oh well, I suppose it will just have to remain a distant dream....

Not far to go now....

Had another crap loss on Monday-this time only 1 1/2lb. Still, I suppose as long as it's going downwards it's better than nothing. Hoping for a better loss this time-so far it's 2 1/2lb-with a couple of days still to go yet. If it stays as it is today I have just under 27lbs to go until I reach my goal! Obviously I'm hoping that it's a bit more than that-and at least another 3lb next week. I want to be as near as possible to the 10's by the time I go back to work.

On Sunday I will have been on CD for 5 whole months. I just don't know where the time's gone. I can't believe that I found a diet I could stick to without cheating once. I'm so, so glad I did this. Just tried on the few remaining items in my wardrobe that I knew didn't fit me. They still don't but I'm much closer than I was before! Looking forward to buying myself a new dress for the party in October-we're going to go to Kingston to have a look round near the end of September. No point going yet-I could have lost a good few more pounds by then! Just imagine-me going in 'normal' clothes shops to buy things!!

My CDC says that she wants to enter me for Slimmer of the Year still. There is no particular criteria-I just have to be at, or near to my goal by November. I'm so flattered by that. I just can't get over the fact that I have ribs-and hip bones. I have knees that I can feel that aren't covered by a layer of fat. I have collar bones and no back fat-a proper waist. I love this feeling and I never want it to end.....

144 days - 6th August

Thought it was about time I posted a catch up. I lost 2lbs for Monday's WI-totm came on Friday eventually so that was quite good for me really, although it's been rather weird this time round. Really heavy to start but finished within 4 days. Normally I have really painful boobs for up to a couple of weeks beforehand, but this time nothing-they hurt now it's finished, so it's really strange. Also have a bit of a stomach 'ache' today. Feeling quite bloated and horrible. It feels like IBS, though I've never suffered with it on this diet before, and not for a long time before that. So far this week I've only lost 1lb so things aren't really looking that great for this week either. I need to lose another 2lb before I've lost 4 1/2 stone-I feel like I've been saying 'I've lost nearly 4 1/2 stone' forever. It would be really great now to have a couple of good weeks to get me over this and a bit nearer to a 5 stone loss. I know my losses seem quite slow compared to a lot on mini's, but I could never have lost this much on any other diet. I just have to keep reminding myself of that every time I have a slow week!

Went out last night. Can't say I was looking forward to it as it meant I had to sit and watch everybody else eat. In the end it didn't bother me nearly as much as I'd thought it would. I couldn't even have a drink, but I took a bottle of water with me. It was fun.

I've now got 30lbs to go until goal. Then I'll see if I want to lose any more when I get there. I think that I'll be happy with 9 stone 7. Then the real fun begins.