Monday, 7 December 2009

Under goal weight

I'm on my second week of 1200 calories now. This morning I'd lost 1/4lb. I'm tending to think of my weight loss more in 2 week gaps now, because my weight fluctuates so much when I first move up a stage. I finally got my totm-10 days late, and my weight went up by nearly 3lb. It's now come back down, making me 9 stone 4 3/4lbs as of this morning.

I'm beginning to realise that, although I like to see the numbers dropping on the scales, it doesn't make a huge difference if my weight does go up by a few pounds-it doesn't make any difference to my measurements. I'm going to have to get used to the fact that the scales aren't going to show losses for much longer. I just hope that I can maintain successfully and not lose the plot completely.

Thursday, 26 November 2009


Finally got to goal on Monday. I'm now on my 2nd week of 1000 and about to move up to 1200 next week.

I actually got to goal a week ago last Sunday, but 1/2lb went back on for weigh in. Then once I was on 1000 the scales yo-yo'd up and down all week. I've actually been enjoying being able to have some pasta, rice and jacket potatoes. My favourite meal so far has to be the wholewheat pasta and quorn, cooked with spinach and a couple of light cheese triangles.

Don't know what I'm going to do for tea next week. I don't like any of the recipes in the Cambridge book. Might see if I can find some diet meals within the calorie allowance. I've got 2 weeks now of 1200 and 2 of 1500. That will take me up to Christmas.

IBS is playing up badly at the moment. Been to the doctor this morning. I'm not even going to think about weighing myself again until I've got over this. The doctor (who was a locum) told me that she thought she was looking at the wrong notes as it said 'BMI over 30'!

Monday, 9 November 2009

Aaargh-still not quite there yet.....

Damn! I was really hoping that I would have lost that 2lb by today, but instead I have to be content with 1lb. Not happy. Was wanting to start on 1000 today, but I don't feel like I can yet as I don't know if that 2lb would go in time. I'll have to see how things go this week.

Went shopping yesterday. Needed new ski jacket and salopettes. Got the jacket in a size 12 as I wanted it more roomy for jumpers, etc underneath, but got the salopettes in a size 10. Tried them on over my leggings to make sure there was plenty of room for thermals. Got a jacket and salopettes for me and a jacket for Brian-just over £60. Well happy with that price.

Did loads of walking around Staines so got plenty of exercise. Then came home and did 40 minutes of an exercise dvd-that did include the hard bits! Feeling really bruised and sore today-don't know why. This isn't my muscles feeling sore, it's as if I've been beaten up kind of bruised feeling. Wonder what causes that.

Am I ever going to get to goal? What worries me is that I'll get there and then put on again when I start on 1000. I must stop obsessing so much on what the scales say.

Thursday, 5 November 2009


Lost 2 1/2lb in the end last week-leaving me with just 3lb to go! Was hoping that if I managed to lose at least 2lb this week I would go up to 1000 next week, but do you think I can manage to get anything off at the moment? So far this week I have lost a measly 1/4lb! Think I am slightly constipated (tmi?), so hoping to lose before Monday morning. My CDC is going to be away soon so I need to get 2 weeks worth this time.

The inches are still dropping a bit. Lost another inch from my bust-making it 35 inches now (!) and also under my bust, making it 29 inches. Still need to start exercising so that I can tone up a bit more, but then my trousers might actually be too big again. My size 10's are now starting to get a bit roomy! Hoping and praying that next time I post it will be to say that I am finally at my goal weight!

Friday, 30 October 2009

Nearly at the finishing post!

As of today I have just under 5lb left to lose-though I am hoping and praying that a bit more weight comes off before Monday morning.

When I last wrote on here I was right about totm. It came the same day! I am enjoying 810 again, but I am really looking forward to going up to 1000. I really think I'm ready for it. Of course I could go up to it now if I wanted to-but I do want to get to goal on 810 first. I know that as I go up my weight loss will slow down a lot more so I can't risk it when I'm so close. Having much more trouble drinking the water at the moment-could be because I'm on a week's holiday at the moment. It's so much easier when I'm at work to get it down. That said, I am at least managing to get the minimum recommended amount inside me if nothing else.

Tried on some jeans in Next yesterday. Never expected to get into the size 12, though they fitted easily-and were probably just a bit big round the waist. Couldn't quite get into the 10-perhaps it was because they were boyfriend jeans and did up round the tummy and not the waist. Seems like I'm the perfect size 11! Not bad for jeans though-I normally have to wear at least one size bigger in jeans, so for me to be anywhere near to fitting into a pair in a 10 is brilliant. Tried another of Claire's dresses on from Jane Norman. Another size 8 and it fits! I'm loving being able to feel my bones! This feeling has to overcome my cravings-this has to be miles better than how eating a packet of crisps or a bar of chocolate makes me feel.

Wish I could be at my goal in the next 10 days or so, but I bet it will be at least another 3 weigh-ins before I am. I had quite a good week last week, so I never have 3 good weeks in a row. I've only lost 1 1/4lb so far this week. I could do with making it at least 2lb. I'd be happy with that.

Friday, 23 October 2009

Feeling gloomy

Feeling a bit fed up right now. Think totm is due any time so that's probably why I'm walking around like I have a big, black cloud over my head. Finally got into the 9's-only for the scales to go up by 1/2lb over the last couple of days and land me back at 10 stone again. I shouldn't be so demoralised by the scales going up-after all I'm still the same size as I was yesterday-but I am. I can't help it. I'm 7lbs away from goal and it might as well be 7 stone again. I just feel like it's taking forever now. I should have been at goal this week if I had good losses, but they've been so shit lately that I'll be lucky to be at goal by December.

It makes me really nervous about eating again. If it's so bad on 810 what on earth is it going to be like at 1000, 1200, 1500? I wanted to be free of this diet for Christmas-I can't follow it on holiday and I didn't want to have to come back to it afterwards. I still don't. I know I'm going to have to up my exercise, but I don't want to be forever exercising just to keep the weight off either. I'm getting scared now. I want to tone up too-hopefully I might lose a few more inches in the right places if I do that. Why can I never be satisfied with how I look? I'm never going to be perfect and I'm never going to love myself. I really thought that I was heading for a better loss this week, but it seems like it's going to be just as bad as the last few weeks have been. I'll show a good loss on my CDC's scales this week anyway, because it's half term and I'm being weighed at 10am rather than after work.

Claire is hopefully going to bring her salopettes for me to try on as my other one's are soooo huge now. I could nearly fit both legs into one of the legs of those! Even my size 12/14 jacket was way too big for me.

Tuesday, 20 October 2009

Still not in the 9's yet....

I've been 10 stone something for 7 weeks now and I'm starting to get pretty pissed off with it. I've had 3 bad attacks of IBS, plus totm which has reduced my weight loss considerably. Last month I lost a measly 7lb. This week, for the first time ever, the scales showed a sts. I just want to get into the 9's now and show a 6 stone loss finally. I have just over 7lb to lose now, but I don't have long before Christmas and our holidays to lose it and move up the plans. I'm starting to get cravings again now-don't know if it's because my totm is due again and it's making me hungrier. I'm debating whether to have another frozen tetra just this once and hoping it won't make a difference. I've had a bar this morning and a tetra plus my chicken tonight-but my 3rd pack would have been the chicken and mushroom soup that I used as a 'stuffing'. I don't know what to do-I want to ignore the craving, but I feel hungry. I think I'm better to give in to a craving for a tetra rather than head for the crisps and sweets. If I get to having just a couple of pounds to lose before our holiday I might move up to 1000 cals and do more exercise. I need to be off this and on my own-I can't be affording this for too much longer.